I realized something and I'm not sure how to deal with it. I realized I'm a compartmentalist. To be honest, I'm not even sure if that's a word but it is now.
Being home with Allie today, just the two of us, I had plenty of time to workout..nothing crazy but some basic things that I knew wouldn't upset my recovery. I put some thought into what that would little "at home" workout would be and then decided to go for it.
About 3 or 4 minutes into it, I was doing bridge lifts and I was already distracted. I just happen to look over at the kitchen and realize I hadn't emptied the dishwasher yet. Argh! But I told myself to let it go and push forward. A couple more minutes went by and I was attempting to do some planks which I haven't done in a while (I didn't do any ab work during the later stages of my pregnancy) and I was planking, I started thinking about all the other stuff I wanted to do on the computer. Anyway, it was enough for me to abandon the little workout and get back to work.
I was frustrated with myself that I was weak and just let all the other distractions win out.
I was scared that maybe it was a sign that I'm not as committed as I think I am to getting my pre-baby fitness back.
I was nervous that I'm going to find myself in more of these types of scenarios in the coming weeks/months and because I can't separate without physically compartmentalizing, I'm never going to be able to get "back into it".
Basically it comes down to this.
I love my gym time, even though half time I end up doing workouts that I could easily do at home. I love the separation it gives me and I know that when I'm there, I'm there. I'm focused and energized (most of the time) by buzz of the gym.
I love my outside running time. Even the thought of doing that at home worries me (even though we don't currently have a functioning treadmill). Will I be able to get lost in the run or will I find myself jumping off the treadmill because I just so happen to see my desk in the corner and it's holding all the school work I have yet to get to.
I know we all talk about being flexible and doing what we can but I guess I'm just getting old and stuck in my ways. Not having the ability to step away and have specific time to dedicate to a workout or whatever the goal is going to be tough.
I know lots of you workout in the A.M. I envy you.
I know lots of you workout at home just fine.
I guess I'll figure it out. I have to, there is no other choice. Running, stay fit is just who I am so I'm pledging now to get it together. Figure it out in a way that is realistic with our new "normal".
What are your biggest challenges to staying fit..getting that run in, etc?
I realized something like this about me, although it's more like if I'm responsible for Ali, which is nearly all the time, I can't do anything else. I am starting to just ask her to come with me on my agenda and she loves it. My advice? Don't worry about how it comes, or how quickly. Just know you will find a way back into it. Keep trying things until you work out the new dynamic. The fact that you even began a workout this early is awesome. My baby is 30 months and I'm finally working out reliably once a week and proud of that much. Worrying just wastes energy.
ReplyDeleteI realized something like this about me, although it's more like if I'm responsible for Ali, which is nearly all the time, I can't do anything else. I am starting to just ask her to come with me on my agenda and she loves it. My advice? Don't worry about how it comes, or how quickly. Just know you will find a way back into it. Keep trying things until you work out the new dynamic. The fact that you even began a workout this early is awesome. My baby is 30 months and I'm finally working out reliably once a week and proud of that much. Worrying just wastes energy.
ReplyDeleteYou will figure out what works for you and your family. For me - it's (mostly) early mornings (that I despise) and a husband who is understanding of my time running/at the gym. For now I would just do what you can, when you can. You'll gradually find more time and more energy. Your priorities will come clear to you. If you have the desire to stay fit you aren't going to lose it! Hang in there mama :)
ReplyDeleteYou will figure out what works for you. I still have times when my mind wanders and I get distracted. I've learned that I have to set xx time for workout and nothing else. All the other "stuff" can wait.
ReplyDeleteOhh yes! This makes so much sense. I'm similar -- I've been working out at home a lot because it's easier to fit into my schedule, but my workouts are SO much more focused and effective when I am physically at the gym. It's too easy to be distracted with other things at home. Hoping to get back into the gym (or outside! Woohoo summer!) soon.
ReplyDeleteThe distraction you described is totally me. I like to finish one thing before I move on to the next: as in the kitchen is cleaned after every meal before I move on to the next thing. This goes for housework,small biz work (I help my hubs with office stuff for his biz), blogging, running etc. I really had a hard time letting go when Jack was first born in september. But slowly I've adapted and learned to let certain things go. For example, post maybe twice a week. I leave breakfast dishes for naptime. I don't feel like I have to be in "workout" clothes to squeeze in some core work: tummy time for Jack = a couple of min. of planking for me. Keep in mind that your hormones are still wacky, in a few months you will feel much more "on top" of your new normal:)
ReplyDeletei think just the time factor. i HAVE to set time aside to workout otherwise itz so easy to make excuses. and i totally love the gym atmosphere!
ReplyDeleteI think you're still in the stages of getting into a routine with A in the mix :) Give it a little more time and it'll fall into place allowing you to put working out back in. I personally have to be outside of the house - I can do a dvd/homeworkout, but I don't put 100% into it as I would outside or at the gym.
ReplyDeleteFor me, work is my biggest hurdle. My schedule starts anywhere from 6am -3pm and at least 2 times per week my shift ends at midnight... talk about being permanently tired!